Let me be specific. The last few, wonderful, adventure-and-delight-filled weeks, I've been followed around the globe from New York to London by an internet curse that will not allow me to consistently access the internet anywhere I go. (Until today, basically.)
See, when I made this commitment to write and publish a blog post each day of the week I don't think the memo got round that I would really be needing internet access like, yunno, every day, on demand, all over the globe, thank you very much.
After a week of issues in NY and another few work days in London trashed by dropped connections...I was left all alone with that little voice insisting that the nationwide authentication fault on BTOpenzone could be resolved with my own two hands if only I was willing to make enough irate phone calls.
Thankfully there's the Other Voice.
It was asking "What are you making this mean about you...?" As I took a moment to uncover what I was telling myself I saw the headlines:
- I am not keeping my commitments (I'm bad)
- I'll disappoint people (no one will like me anymore)
- I could do more (I should be perfect)
I think very often we tell ourselves "there's nothing you can do, so don't sweat it" and that can be all it takes. We just walk away. But for those times when it's hard to just let go and be happy regardless, it's useful to see the little horror movies we’ve got playing our heads. If nothing else than just to see how very silly we can be sometimes.
It's nice to be back.
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