What You Say Is What You Get 01/27/2010
"If you think you can, or if you think you can't, either way, you're right." Henry Ford  We all experience the world, not as it is, but through the filter of our thoughts about it. No matter how you think of yourself, or how you have judged yourself - good news. Not everything you tell yourself is true. We can stop because we started it On the show today, It Is What You Say It is, (Jan 27) I talked about what builds the house you live in. Ever catch yourself saying "Oh, I'm not good at that"? Our opinions and beliefs build our limiting walls. I've had many clients tell me they can't manage this or that based on having never really tried it. We bust right through those to incredible new places. How? Because they are just lies. They are lies that we install not just as our walls but also as the windows in our house. Through these lies we view the world outside: a limited place of ever decreasing possibility. It doesn't have to be this way. No matter how long ago you started, or how well practiced you are, or how scary the lie. Luckily, you can't make a lie true, just by believing it for a long time Love is one of the big, big areas where we make a lot of decisions about how limited our lives - and our chances! - are: there are only so many single people, only so many healthy single people, only so many not-entirely-insane single people. Oh, we have so many fixed ideas! But love isn't limited at all. Love is who you are and it doesn't arrive when your life partner does, or when your child hugs you, or when you complete a successful project. It is always there for you to have and depends on nothing at all. (see the show Jan 29 All You Need Is Love when I talk to John Welshons, author of One Soul, One Love, One Heart ) Greg Baer illustrated this so well in his Master Class with SuperCoach Academy this week. This is roughly the story: So there you are sitting by the pool, enjoying the sun on your dream vacation. And someone from the pool is splashing you and splashing you, and you are getting wetter and wetter and angrier and angrier. Then you finally move enough to look into the pool and give this person a piece of your mind, when you realize they are drowning. What would have to "happen" for you to lose you anger and get in touch with caring about them? Nothing. Your anger is just gone in a poof, you become instantly overcome with a deep desire to help. Love is just there, in every moment. It's a decision. Love is just there in every moment. OK, I just said that. But... Does that sound possible? Does that sound true? Why would you even care? I'm reminded of an extraordinary day, a day when everyone in New York - and then around the world - suddenly became aware of the presence, the importance and the interconnectedness of us all. We were deeply moved by the preciousness of life. What I notice when I think about 9/11 is, that day people made a choice to love, to care, to feel connected. You didn't have to. You just did. That choice is available always. Why is it important to know this? So you can. Listen to the show here 5 Tips for Staying Balanced (by Asha Praver) 01/08/2010
 Times are uncertain. There are no easy solutions. Our inner beliefs are being tested by circumstances that seem beyond our control. Whether the future will be the same as the past, or bring an entirely new paradigm, remains to be seen. Whatever the future holds, the present uncertainty is both an opportunity and an incentive to build inner strength. Now is the time to develop those attitudes and habits that will enable us to face, with calm acceptance and joy, whatever comes. Here are five tips to stay balanced: Relax Upward: Don’t think only in terms of “down time.” Think also of “up time.” There are two ways to relax. One is to shut down awareness with things like television, beer, or excessive sleep. The other way to rejuvenate is by expanding awareness. Build into your daily or weekly schedule spiritually centering activities. Learn to meditate. Read uplifting books. Attend classes on life-enhancing subjects. Listen to calm, inspiring music. Be out in nature. Get to know yourself in solitude and silence. Be Original: To be original does not mean doing something that has never been done before. It means to act from your own point of origin. Don’t allow yourself to become a dull reflection of the world around. Think deeply. Act consciously. Be sincere in everything that you do. If circumstances require you to accommodate yourself to the needs and demands of others, concentrate on inner freedom. See yourself as a single thread in the vast, unfolding tapestry of life. Through love, compassion, and generosity of heart, make yourself into a thread of gold. Be Creative: The secret of prosperity is creativity. This will become especially important if times get hard. Whether you define success as all the things that money can buy or all the things that money can’t buy, a creative person never accepts failure or limitation as the final decree of fate. If one approach didn’t work, then go after the same goal from another angle. See every day, every situation as a fresh opportunity to discover some yet unknown possibility. Be on the lookout for new and improved ways of doing even oft-repeated tasks. Be mentally active. If your work leaves your mind free, then sing, pray for yourself and others, memorize and repeat poetry. Creativity in itself brings joy. And sooner or later, the positive magnetism of your creative attitude will bring you whatever you seek. You Are What You Eat: Think in terms of life force. Fresh, natural food is filled with vitality. Devitalized food makes, not only a heavy body, but also a heavy mind. In these uncertain times, you can’t afford the extra burden. There is so much life force in an apple, for example, that, if you bury it in the ground, the seeds can sprout, and one apple becomes an apple tree. Bury a “Big Mac,” and nothing more will come of it! The net result of consuming too much over-processed foods is less than zero. It takes more energy to digest such foods than they can ever give back to you in life force. Trying to right the balance with more caffeine is not the solution! You don’t have to be a fanatic and change your diet overnight. Just gradually begin eating more foods in their natural state or close to it, and your own experience will be your guide. Strength in Numbers: You have to walk the path yourself, but you don’t have to walk it alone. In times of stress especially, the presence of like-minded companions can make all the difference in whether you keep going or give up in despair. If you don’t have supportive friends, then go out and find them! Group spiritual practices are especially beneficial, giving you the experience and power you need to go deeper on your own as well. Visit meditation centers, churches, and spiritual groups of all kinds until you find those people and practices that resonate with your own inner self. Listen to the show with Asha here Asha Praver is a lecturer, teacher, counselor, Spiritual Co-Director of the Ananda Palo Alto Community, and author of Swami Kriyananda as We Have Known Him. Asha has been trained in yoga, meditation, and spiritual living by Swami Kriyananda, who was a direct disciple of Paramhansa Yogananda. Since 1969 Asha has been a disciple, a meditator, and an intentional community member. Contact Asha at www.ashapraver.com. The one who dies with the most shoes wins? 12/23/2009
 You know those moments when you 'space out' for a bit? It just lasts a few seconds. But it gives me shivers to think that could apply to a whole life. I have this horrible thought that I might wake up one day and realize I didn't have I life, just a lot of Coach bags. A life who's motto would be "I came, I slept, I shopped." One of the books that really fed my longing for more awareness and conscious action in my own life is Anthony de Mello's "Awareness." Please put this book on your 'read before I die' list. De Mello was a Jesuit priest, a delightful, spiritual - and very frank - man who cared about all of us knowing that it was possible to live life awake. He begins the book, which is a transcript of his lectures "Wake Up To Life" at Fordham University by saying we "are born asleep, we marry in our sleep and we die asleep." Not a new idea. One that many other teachers would agree with, from Don Miguel Ruiz to Jesus. The really horrifying this about this idea for me is that we can be asleep, but not even know it. Like in the film, The Matrix. Watched The Matrix lately? It's interesting that first line. Wake up, Neo... Awareness for me is a commitment. I wanted to live 'awake' (I use that carefully, as I try to be mindful of setting up some states as 'good' and others as 'bad') for some practical reasons: so I could stop repeating some old mistakes, not be so motivated by fear and become more open to getting better answers for myself. It has proved to be a very fruitful place for me to explore. To hear my show on Awareness from December 23rd It includes Anthony de Mello's 4 ways of taking action to come into greater awareness that you can try out for yourself This is your new blog post. Click here and start typing, or drag in elements from the top bar. Tracing the Lines of Your Story 12/06/2009
 We all have explanations for why our lives are the way they are: divorce, money fear, angry households growing up. I dedicated a show to how to unravel your story and get free. (Nov 25, 2009). The reason you might want to get to know your story is so that you can really be honest with yourself about the ways your story might be ruling your life - instead of you being in charge! If there is something in your life you want and you haven't got round to it yet... if there is something you do, that you've promised yourself you'd stop doing, but you 'just haven't yet' ... you probably have a story about why this is the case. If you really want to make that change that you say you are aiming for, getting shot of your story is critical. A story is made up of all the stressful thoughts and beliefs that you hold about why things are the way they are (and usually, why they can't change!) In the show I talk about the story of 'my father left me' and how that devastated me and ruined my relationship with my father for many years. It's because I got wise to my story, that my father is my best friend today and we have a great relationship. If you feel ready to start owning your life, rather than being a victim of your story I hope you'll use the show, and try out the ideas. In this show I gave an exercise for revealing and tracing the links of your story. Here it is:
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